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GirlFriend 1.0

A few months ago, I upgraded from DrinkingMates 4.2 to Girlfriend 1.0
which I had been told for years wouldn't give me any trouble. However,
there are apparently conflicts between these two products and the only
solution was to try and run Girlfriend 1.0 with the sound turned off.

To make matters worse, Girlfriend 1.0 is incompatible with several other
applications, such as LadsNightOut 3.1, Football 4.5, and Playboy 6.9.
Successive versions of Girlfriend 1.0 proved no better.

I tried a shareware program, Slapper 2.1, but it had many bugs and left
a virus in my system, forcing me to shut down completely for several
weeks.

Eventually, I tried to run the new Girlfriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at
the same time, only to discover that when these two systems detected
each other they caused severe damage to my hardware. I eventually
upgraded to Fiancée 1.0, only to discover that this product soon had to
be upgraded further to Wife 1.0.

Whilst Wife 1.0 tends to use up all my available resources, it does at
least come bundled with FreeSexPlus and CleanHouse 2005. Shortly after
this upgrade however, I found that Wife 1.0 could be very unstable and
extremely costly to run.

Any mistakes I made were automatically stored in Wife 1.0's memory and
could not be deleted. They then resurfaced months later when I had
forgotten about them. Wife 1.0 also has an automatic Diary, Explorer and
E-mail filter, and can, without warning, launch TurboStrop and Whinge 2.

Worse still, these latter products have no Help files, and I have to try
and guess what the problem is.

Additional problems are that Wife 1.0 needs updating regularly
requiringAdobe ShoeShop, HandBag Searcher and Hairstyle Express, all of
which need to be reinstalled every other week. Also, when Wife 1.0
attaches itself to my Audi TT hard drive, it often crashes. Wife 1.0
also comes with an irritating pop-up called MotherInLaw, which can't be
turned off.

I've recently been tempted to install Mistress 2005, but there could be
problems. A friend of mine has alerted me to the fact that if Wife 1.0
detects Mistress 2005 it tends to delete all of your money before
uninstalling itself.